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Friday, April 3, 2009

Plato Begins

I am 21 now and still feel so helplessly vulnerable. Paradigms shifted at every corner, and re-created again at every new beginning makes for an eternally confusing thought process. I can be feeling completely satisfied, then before I even know what’s happening, some unexpected miniscule detail alters my entire world. It’s a long windy maze with a million possible dead ends… and no foreseeable exit. Plato once wrote, “The beginning is the most important part of any work, especially in the case of a young and tender thing; for that is the time at which the character is being formed and the desired impression more readily taken.” When does this “beginning” end? I still don’t even know what my own desired impression is. Even thinking about it now, I cringe at the thought of imagining my life ten years down the road and will never understand why society dictates that it’s good to do so. Life is full of the unexpected and unknown. That’s what makes it so enticing. That’s what makes it worth living. Like any other, I set goals and daydream about the future, but having an image of an ideal future only limits you. It sets up expectations that are often unrealistic, and essentially… boring. I would hate it if in ten years I looked back and realized I was exactly where I expected I would be.
So when does this “beginning” end? When does the vulnerability creep away?
For me?
Never.

I’m always changing, always challenging my own thoughts and my own opinion of myself. It makes me hard to catch, and even harder to hold on to, but worth it in the end. So… cheers. To never accepting the minimum, or constraining the perfection of your life. And cheers again, to the beginning of forever.

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