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Sunday, April 5, 2009

Puppies

I like to re-read my journal entries, even from just the day before... and this one i found... I've even decided to type out for you to read today. I'm a bit of a depressing girl sometimes...(proven here) but this particular entry struck a cord somewhere, and I felt it needed to be here. So, here it is. Here we go.

"I can hear a puppy barking and whining sadly off in the distance and realize, I've never felt more like that puppy in my whole life. I'm lost, alone, young and afraid. I sit here trying to be positive, wondering why I cant think of one single thing that’s good in my life… and realize again, that I'm worse then that puppy. That he is blissfully ignorant not knowing how much better his life could be. That he is probably just hungry. But he sounds so miserable. I want to find him and sit down for a while. Just show him for at least one moment in his life what it’s like to be loved and fed – but I don’t go. I've been crying for the last hour – just like him. Where are all the people I care about? Are they thinking of me too? Maybe it all doesn’t matter as much as it seems. I'm alive. I'm laying a warm comfortable bed, I’m healthy and I'm here… So today, I’m a puppy, tomorrow I might be a bitch but I’ll still be just as lost and alone. Until the day comes where I’m shown a reason to be happy."

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